I am prone to fits of enthusiasm.

It's been forever!

Sun, 30 Sep 2012 00:14:35 -0400

Yikes! How could I have neglected this blog for so long? Sorry, y’all- and thanks for sticking around.

Things these days are pretty good! Came out to three of my best friends and it feels awesome :D Thinking I’m getting close to that place with my family where I might be able to have that conversation and know that they’ll be mostly okay with it. My biggest fear is that they won’t love me as much anymore… but I just have to keep reminded myself that that is a silly notion. My parents are awesome in every other respect, and they are pretty accepting of gay folks already. They tell me all the time how proud they are of me, and how much they love what I’m doing in school and are supportive of my going to grad school. It’s hard to believe that they would change their minds.

So I guess, at this point, it’s less that I’m keeping my sexuality from them, but more like waiting for a good time… as in, when I might feasibly be in a relationship (or when I finally get fed up with my mom making comments about when I’ll find a husband). It’s not perfect, but I’m not afraid and that is a lot.

xoxo! Jeanie

wereherewerequeer: queerloveforever: dontbeshysteve: cute old...

Mon, 05 Dec 2011 16:11:09 -0500

wereherewerequeer:

queerloveforever:

dontbeshysteve:

cute old gay men.

This is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.

I need some tissues. :’)

So beautiful!

Fisting 101: now with subtitles!

Wed, 26 Oct 2011 19:20:00 -0400

Fisting 101: now with subtitles!:

innerfatgirl:

click here for the subtitled version of the Fisting 101 video!

(NSFW)

It’s all in the title, folks, and this is probably one of the most incredible videos I’ve ever seen on the subject (okay, the only one I’ve seen) REGARDLESS it’s incredible. And it’s SO important to educate ourselves on safe sex practices- especially non-normative ones!

Consent is sexy! Communication is sexy! Education is sexy!

(Round of applause for the makers of this video, seriously)

Facts about being in the closet:

Mon, 24 Oct 2011 22:34:37 -0400

After doing a lot of soul-searching, I have discovered that I an truly Kinsey-6 gay. All the sexual energy within me is for women!

It’s hard being such a lesbian and being in the closet because my friends don’t know, and unknowingly put me in strict heteronormative situations, and I’m like… uhhh…. sure he’s hot?

It’s a tough situation but I feel so much better accepting who I am, and one day I’ll be comfortable enough with myself to tell more than one friend. And I’m not the kind of person to make a big announcement about anything, so my close friends are the only ones who really need to know anyway. I’m getting increasingly comfortable with this.

Just wanted to share my happy and just a little sad moment with you all! Thanks for your support :) It means so much!

Photo

Sat, 22 Oct 2011 21:10:33 -0400

rillawafers: #nailedit

Thu, 20 Oct 2011 22:58:29 -0400

rillawafers:

#nailedit

therumorsaretru: forever reblog.

Tue, 18 Oct 2011 21:02:28 -0400

therumorsaretru:

forever reblog.

Photo

Tue, 18 Oct 2011 20:58:14 -0400

therumorsaretru: Gungor “God is not a white Man” (by...

Tue, 18 Oct 2011 20:56:12 -0400

therumorsaretru:

Gungor “God is not a white Man” (by whitespot888)

YES!

"There is controversy over whether an orientation once fixed is ever open to reversal. But there is..."

Sun, 16 Oct 2011 17:01:00 -0400

“There is controversy over whether an orientation once fixed is ever open to reversal. But there is general agreement that at the very least it is extremely resistant to change even among highly motivated people.”

- -Dan O. Via, homosexual-affirming theologian.

I (Jeanie) have been spending most of my life since childhood trying to make myself fit in to the heterosexual mold my family and society and church have cut out for me. I have lied to others and to myself to fit into the mold. It is time that I am true to myself and others, accept that I am not straight, and I’m proud to be a lesbian.

I was one of the most highly motivated people Via is speaking of. I spent well over a decade trying to force myself to be attracted to a gender that I’m not, and I did this at great cost to myself. Discovering who you are is hard to do when you repeatedly lie because you would feel ostracized and hated by your peers if you were different. Fitting in was the safe and acceptable thing to do, so I did it.

I will never have all those years back, but they taught me a great lesson. Being true to yourself is so important, and being able to be true to yourself without fear is an incredible gift. I will never be ungrateful for the supportive people in my life, because I know how bad it can be.

And for anyone else out there struggling, I’m here for you. Give yourself permission to be true to yourself, even if it’s only to me, even if it’s only to yourself.

I came out to one of my best friends last night. (First time coming out!)

Sun, 16 Oct 2011 14:44:57 -0400

We were both tipsy from homecoming celebrations and went outside our dorm to clear our heads.

Through the course of conversation, she told me she had been kind of struggling with her sexual identity because she felt, at this stage in her life, that she didn’t care about the gender of the person she fell in love with. It was in the mind, and gender didn’t matter. She had already talked to one of her best friends (a gay man), her father, and a few other close friends so she didn’t really need reassurance- she just wanted to tell me.

Our conversation continued and we talked about some deep stuff, and eventually started talking about my undergrad research. I told her I just couldn’t understand why the gender of someone’s partner would matter to someone else. I told her I grew up in a family of homophobes. I told her I came from a homophobic church.

And I told her that my mother has occasionally asked me, since high school, if I was gay. I told her I always laughed it off and said no, but now I’m not really so sure. I explained to her how I always tried to act “straight” through school, identifying as straight myself but, for some reason, feeling the need to convince the world of it. I couldn’t seem to convince myself so I needed my peers’ approval.

I told her about when my friends got boy crazy, I wasn’t. I told her about lying about having a crush or finding a guy attractive, and how to this day I still haven’t found anything about any man remotely attractive or romantic. I never had romantic notions about a man, and when my friends would daydream about their weddings I realized I never did. I thought about future kids but never their father and never my groom. Granted, I never thought of a wife or other mother, but I started to have to fabricate that, too.

I told her I’d talked to another friend about this before, about how I was kind of concerned I’d never been attracted to a guy, but when she asked me if I found women attractive I said no. I told my friend last night that I have always known that that “no” was a lie.

I told her I desperately wished all this was a phase. That every night when I go to bed, every time I get in the shower, every time I get online for support I beg and plead for this to go away because it’s so much to handle. I told her I knew I had three options: come out to everyone and loose family, friends, my old church “family”, but life a genuine life. I could not be out and be alone forever, or I could not be out and hide it from my family.

Then I realized I was referring to my sexuality as “it”. As if my sexuality was a disease or an inanimate object. I felt so bad for treating myself like that.

But my friend was so supportive- I knew she would be. Especially after she told me what she did- which I kind of already knew.

Now I feel better knowing I told someone but worse because now someone knows- I’ve said that I’m gay but don’t want to accept it. She told me that was fine and these things take time to figure out.

I can’t process this anymore so I’m going to end the post there. I wish this was better-written but I’m pretty frazzled right now. Thanks for your support :)

Photo

Thu, 13 Oct 2011 22:53:09 -0400

My shirt for National Coming Out Day! I led a workshop on...

Wed, 12 Oct 2011 13:51:00 -0400

My shirt for National Coming Out Day! I led a workshop on creating safe spaces to discuss gender and sexuality questions. It went really well!

A letter to the PC(USA) via Rev. Hunter Farrell from Desmond Tutu about 10-A

Wed, 12 Oct 2011 13:34:29 -0400

hjscott:

Dear Brother in Christ,

I am writing you with the request that you share these thoughts with my brothers and sisters in the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.):

It is incumbent upon all of God’s children to speak out against injustice. It is sometimes equally important to speak in solidarity when justice has been done.   For that reason I am writing to affirm my belief that in making room in your constitution for gay and lesbian Christians to be ordained as church leaders, you have accomplished an act of justice.

I realize that among your ecumenical partners, some voices are claiming that you have done the wrong thing, and I know that you rightly value your relationship with Christians in other parts of the world. Sadly, it is not always popular to do justice, but it is always right. People will say that the ones you are now willing to ordain are sinners. I have come to believe, through the reality shared with me by my scientist and medical friends, and confirmed to me by many who are gay, that being gay is not a choice. Like skin color or left-handedness, sexual orientation is just another feature of our diversity as a human family. How wonderful that God has made us with so much diversity, yet all in God’s image!   Salvation means being called out of our narrow bonds into a broad place of welcome to all.

You are undoubtedly aware that in some countries the church has been complicit in the legal persecution of lesbians and gays. Individuals are being arrested and jailed simply because they are different in one respect from the majority. By making it possible for those in same-gender relationships to be ordained as pastors, preachers, elders, and deacons, you are being a witness to your ecumenical partners that you believe in the wideness of God’s merciful love.

For freedom Christ has set us free. In Christ we are not bound by old, narrow prejudice, but free to embrace the full humanity of our brothers and sisters in all our glorious differences. May God bless you as you live into this reality, and may you know that there are many Christians in the world who continue to stand by your side.

God bless you.

Archbishop Emeritus Desmond Tutu (Cape Town, South Africa)

Beautiful! Thank you, Archbishop, for recognizing what the PC(USA) has been attempting to do since the 1970’s. For all justice, equality, and love, we give God thanks.

ocelott: The actions of the Boston PD will not go unnoticed....

Wed, 12 Oct 2011 13:23:40 -0400

ocelott:

The actions of the Boston PD will not go unnoticed. Spread this like wildfire.

shitttits: amandafiske: Say hello to mechanically separated...

Wed, 12 Oct 2011 13:23:20 -0400

shitttits:

amandafiske:

Say hello to mechanically separated chicken. It’s what all fast food chicken is made from- things like chicken nuggets and patties. Also, the processed frozen chicken in stores is made from it. Basically the entire chicken is smashed and pressed through a sieve – bones, eyes, guts, and all.It comes out looking like this.

There’s more: because it’s crawling with bacteria, it will be washed with ammonia, soaked in it, actually. Then, because it tastes gross, it will be re-flavored artificially. Then, because it is weirdly pink, it will be dyed with artificial color.

Sounds appetising right?

Source: http://www.snopes.com/food/prepare/msm.asp

this is why I’m veg

D:

i thought that was ice cream

Y’all are very wise to consider the origins of your food. However, this story is only partially true. Here’s a little more info on MSM (Mechanically separated meat) and how it’s used in meat products today.

b-r-i-g-h-t-l-i-g-h-t-s: REBLOG.

Tue, 11 Oct 2011 20:48:10 -0400

b-r-i-g-h-t-l-i-g-h-t-s:

REBLOG.

Photo

Tue, 11 Oct 2011 13:30:51 -0400

"The Presbyterian Church (USA) ordained its first openly gay minister on Saturday in Madison,..."

Sun, 09 Oct 2011 21:57:37 -0400

“The Presbyterian Church (USA) ordained its first openly gay minister on Saturday in Madison, Wisconsin, three months after lifting its long-standing ban on homosexual clergy.”

- Presbyterian Church ordains first gay minister | Reuters (via simsian)

So proud of the denomination I grew up in!

A directory of LGBT friendly churches in the United States

Sun, 09 Oct 2011 21:21:56 -0400

A directory of LGBT friendly churches in the United States